Tuesday, August 25, 2009

How I found my wedding dress: The finale

Previously:
Part I: Having my doubts
Part II: Breaking the rules!
Part III: A swing and a miss
Part IV: Do we have a winner?
Part V: Size me up

(source)
After leaving the shop, $250 lighter and one contract for a wedding dress(!!!!!) heavier, my mom wanted to go to the mall on some errand. I was shockingly tired after the relief of buying my dress, though—it's funny how we sometimes don't recognize a stressful situation when we're in it, when it's a happy kind of stress!

At some point in the car, she asked me if I was excited that I got my dress. Kind of? "I just wanted you to be more into it. I didn't feel like you were that excited about it, and that's what I really wanted from you today."

Her response surprised me. "Of course I was excited. Did you want me to cry? I'll do plenty of that at your wedding. I just wanted to help you and I could do that if I didn't get too emotional. [SS1] wouldn't even let me give an opinion...!"

I don't remember the rest of what she said—it wasn't really important because I finally began to understand what she actually meant. I'd been unfair in my assumptions: I thought her aloofness was from not caring. But she didn't want to be the mom who gets emotional and tears up; she wanted to be the mom who is involved and who helps make decisions. She might not give me what I want sometimes, but she is doing her best to give me what she thinks I want. And I have to start giving her credit for that.

We were on our way back to my apartment when it finally hit me, and I felt this huge rush of excitement. Sure I wasn't standing in front of a mirror in the dress, but we bought it. It's ordered and on its way. I'm getting married in less than seven months! I just got my wedding dress! I blurted it out in the car, and do you know what my mom did?

She told me I was beautiful, and she cried.

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